Archive for the ‘Trailer Releases’ Category


Finding Nemo has swam his back into the recent times!

It’s so childish how excited I am for this movie. I don’t know if you know, but I have three fish tanks.  One is 90 gallons, another is 10, and another is ten.  I don’t know if I’ve ever shown them on my blog, but I think it’s time:


The babies!

I have a ten gallon with a betta also, but that tank is really my show tank (it’s also understocked).  My other ten gallon has baby Pictus catfish.

So.. Finding Dory.

Well, Disney has made it pretty clear they know Millennials have a weakness:  And that weakness is nostalgia.  Millennials love nostalgia.  In fact, as a Millennial, I was reading about how much we love nostalgia last night before bed.  I was searching for the reason why we love it as much as we do.  There is no doubt Disney is riding that train and milking it for what they can – and my generation certainly isn’t protesting.

Onto Finding Dory, now, for real, though.

I really love what Finding Nemo does.  As you can see, I have a fish tank.  As you can see, my tank is well taken care of.  But, in Finding Nemo, if you recall, the fish are placed into a small tank and want to escape.  Well, the thing is, that can actually happen (minus the escaping).  I have a betta fish, which is one of the most abused fish out there.  Betta fish typically need water in the high 70s or low 80s,a filter, and at least 3-5 gallons to swim in.  Fish, too, get bored. My betta resides in his own ten gallon tank, all to himself – he has two filters, rock substrate, gets frozen/freeze dried/pellet food, and tons of plants to explore and hide in. I also bought him his own toys and special floating hiding spots.  I also saved him from death – a child was about to buy him and put him back on the shelf.  I snabbed him the minute they put him back.

But I want to tell you what Finding Nemo does right about fish.

You’re gonna hate me now.

Fish only get loony as they do in Finding Nemo for one reason – the tank is too small.  Yes, I am saying fish can get loony.  If you screw something up, make the tank too small, add too many fish, or add fish that aren’t the appropriate size for the tank (say, you know, goldfish in a bowl.. or ten gallon tank), fish will be batshit crazy.  Fish will not be happy.  Fish will be aggressive, lethargic, and just generally unhappy.  I know because I have kept fish since I was 4.  I have had 20 gallons, 10 gallons, 40 gallons, and 90 gallons (and I hope to get a 125 gallon next).  I have raised fish and given them away, I have kept individual fish for years (5 years on one Tetra, now deceased; I am now raising a 6 inch, 3 year old catfish, who I have had for all 3 years), and I know if they aren’t happy.  I can tell if an altercation is about to begin, I can tell if one fish doesn’t like another, and I can tell if something is bothering them and what that is.

Point being, fish are really fucking complicated, and a bowl is not an adequate living space for a goldfish, betta, or rock, even.  And that’s what I liked about Finding Nemo.  Finding Nemo put them in a small tank and they weren’t happy.  But the problem is, the public took something entirely different away from it.  Like most movies that feature certain dog breeds, such as German Shepherds, the same happened with Finding Nemo.  When a certain movie about a dog is popular, the first thing people do after seeing the movie is go and adopt a dog of that breed – which is asinine.  That happened to Finding Nemo, too.  People went out and bought Hippo Tangs (Dory), Clownfish (Nemo), Moorish idols (Gill), and Yellow Tangs (Bubbles) without actually knowing a thing about fish or what they require because of Finding Nemo.  There is a reason they want to escape the tank.  Fish are living, breathing beings.  They have requirements just like any dog, cat, bird, horse, or lizard.  I liked that the movie highlighted the mistreatment of fish and how they are often crammed into small spaces inappropriate for them to live in – the problem is, it only made the problem worse.  That’s why I’m including this paragraph.  When you see Finding Nemo, or Finding Dory, or any movie about any animal, do not go and buy one because the Pixar or Disney version is cute. 



And it seems to hit on this in Finding Dory, according to this still:

Fish need stimulation (Dory’s tank is empty).  Fish need others of their kind (she’s alone).  Fish need an appropriate sized tank (unknown tank size).  Fish need you to take care of them properly.  But for fuck’s sake, please don’t get an octopus.

The trailer, though, starts out with Dory sleeping while apparently dreaming about her origins.  Soon, she swims off.  The next few clips is Dory trying to find her family, and soon, she starts remembering things, which is character development for Dory.  Ultimately, the trailer is about how the story begins.  I know, apparently, there will be new characters.  Particularly Hank the Octopus, Bailey the Beluga, and Destiny the whale shark (source below).  There isn’t a whole lot to say about Finding Dory, other than the lovable Hippo Tang seems to be back in action.  The trailer doesn’t reveal much, which is a good thing.  I can only hope they manage to make the same sort of statements about fish, the ocean, and how we treat them.  The animations look solid, and the soundtrack seems quite exciting.

Overall, whether you have a fish tank or not, you’ll be excited for Dory’s next adventures.


I asked a knowledgeable friend to write my Star Wars post. He is probably more of a movie buff than me! I’m not the biggest fan and I wouldn’t do it justice. Contact me for more info on him! Thanks again for writing the post. If you want to be a guest feel free to contact me on Twitter.

Well it’s here, it’s finally here. Unless you’ve been living long ago in a galaxy far, far way then you have heard about Star Wars and more importantly for this conversation Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ inaugural teaser trailer. And if you do live in another galaxy in the past then we have other issues. Anyway, that trailer….As you can imagine, the response, views and reactions for it have been massive–record-setting–which isn’t surprising for the world’s largest movie franchise and, as a result, the world’s largest nerd community. The trailer was so big that at least two separate versions of it have registered 10 million+ views of it on youtube in 3 days; the Star Wars and MovieClips channel with the latter having 36+ million. Then there is the George Lucas-ized parody version of it with 5.5 million hits in 1 day and the lego version with 2.5 million in two days. It is probably needless to mention the many other uploads across youtube and the web that have hundreds of thousands and millions of hits as well. This movie is humongous and really anticipated.

And you must be thinking with that kind of pressure and that kind of angst and especially that kind of expectation this teaser will be 3 minutes and spoil half the movie? Well you’d be wrong because that isn’t Star Wars or J.J. Abrams style. Let me preface this by saying I am a prequel fan and an Abrams fan and so my opinion may not and probably is not the prevailing attitude of the Wars community at large–at least when dishing out praise for those two subjects. Anyway, back to that trailer topic. It came to my attention through an Abrams interview with Howard Stern on Stern’s radio show that Abrams has major reservations about revealing much of anything in marketing and prefers to keep the audience guessing and off-balance. As a result I did not expect much with the rumored teaser at all. As expected, the trailer was short, sweet and revealed nothing of import plot-wise. What we got were flashes of a handful of figures and then one massive fanservice tease that would make any fanboy with a soul or a pulse shit their pants. All of this was pleasantly positively received, fans of course have craved for another Star Wars since 2005 when the saga under George Lucas concluded, but when Disney purchased and announced new episodes anticipation was at a fever pitch to see what they can do; this may have colored a few opinions both ways but nevertheless the reaction to it had to be what Disney was pleased with. It was just like 1998 again when The Phantom Menace was teased–the first film from the second Star Wars trilogy. It did all it set out to do and left people wanting more excited and hungrier for more footage or info, a perfect storm for The Force Awakens.

Now to the part a lot of people may be looking for, a break down of some sort. To be honest the trailer was so short, so sparse with information and connectivity it will be quite difficult to make a proper breakdown, this will mostly be filled with background information, conjecture and facts about it that don’t involve the plot. So yeah I suppose it is time to start.

The teaser opens quietly on a very familiar landscape, one featured in every Star Wars film to date bar the highest-received on (Empire Strikes Back). That landscape, or should I say planet, is the desert planet Tatooine, the homeworld of the Skywalker boys Anakin and his son Luke. This time however there is a decidedly different character popping up. With voiceover provided by Andy Serkis (mentioning the film’s subtitle no less), a disheveled man stormtrooper armor sans the helmet rises into camera view in a befuddled tizzy. Said man is actor and presumed lead actor John Boyega. Anyway, the character who has yet to be named publicly appears to be in a sweaty frenzy in the middle of Tatooine’s harsh, rolling desert (with a slight audible probe droid transmission in the background–or at least the probe droid’s speech sound effects from Empire Strikes Back–perhaps hinting that he is being hunted for by Imperial Forces?). Next we see a squat, rolling droid/robot with the head of an R2 astromech (the production model/droid type made famous by R2-D2), making cute little beeps while rolling through a junkyard(?) in one of Tatooine’s many famous towns (Anchorhead, Mos Espa, Mos Eisley, etc) and surveying its surroundings. This character was also not given a name. Next couple shots deal with a squadron of stormtroopers in low blue lighting and traveling aboard a gunship or spacecraft of some sort before a ramp opens up, suggesting they jump out. Either this is hearkening back to Boyega’s character in full uniform or this is a separate Imperial Stormtrooper (maybe they are hunting him?) . Either way, eagle-eyed fans will notice the armor has been touched up with a slightly different helmet than what was issued in the classic original trilogy from 30+ years ago (upgrades?). They prepare to go out into a windy, dark, somewhat lit place.

After the brief glimpses of stormtroopers we see yet another new character being introduced on Tatooine–playing an important role in the film perhaps?. This one is a woman dressed in local/peasant garb riding a speeder bike of some sort. She quickly looks back behind her and races off toward a town. Maybe she is the object of the stormies search or the droid’s or even Boyega, either way she seems to be a popular character at this point. The actress playing her is Daisy Ridley, she has long been rumored to be the child of Han Solo and Princess Leia Organa/Skywalker–two important characters from the original films. No confirmation has been made on her as well. Now we are getting into the juicier stuff. Adam Driver has been the center of a great deal of speculation, with many stating he’d be a villain or working his way up to one starting with this movie. It is clear off the bat that the former rumor is false considering he is an X-Wing pilot and a member of the Republic/Rebellion’s militia who were the good guys in the older films. This, however, does not preclude him turning later on. We do know that X-Wings and Rebel pilots are still operating in some capacity which also makes one wonder whether the Galactic Civil War is still raging 30 years from the onset of the destruction of the First Death Star or if a tenuous peace was consummated between the Rebels and Empire–which leads to the crux of the conflict in this film and beyond. One thing is clear–both factions exist still, long after Darth Vader and the Emperor’s death.

Serkis’s narration continues over a mysterious cloaked figure trudging with purpose through a dark, wintry forest. He waxes philosophically about the dark side of the Force while the character reveals what happens to be a lightsaber hilt in the style of medieval broadswords such as Excalibur or Lord of the Rings styled swords. A red blade emits from the hilt and two smaller ones jut out as handle guards to protect the user’s hands from an opposing lightsaber. As we all know red is the color of the Sith which were purportedly destroyed some 30 years prior, have they returned? Was the Force not balanced or does that mean something else entirely now? Who is this guy and is he the leader or someone else leads him? Is he the narrator or not?

And boy oh boy did they save the best for last. I really mean that. This is where fanboys crapping their pants would occur. The one moment that makes this trailer worthwhile and quite possibly better than any other trailer that have graced our memories recently (many competitors for that between Jurassic World, Avengers: Age of Ultron, Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies, etc). I mean the scene is just that epic for fans. And that scene (with Serkis talking about the light side in juxtaposition) is the sudden appearance of the Millennium Falcon in full glory–AND ENGINES GOING FULL BLAST!–flying over the sunny sand dunes of Tatooine with the majesty and beauty of the Star Wars theme blaring (complete with a blaring brass section–did I mention the man was composing for this film? John Williams). It does a quick loop just before flying low over the dunes toward a duo of TIE fighters. Their familiar roar of their engines renewing a sense of nostalgia in us–as well as their horrendous aim–heading on a collision course with the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy. SPOILER: They do not crash. Further, sharp-eyed fans will notice the replacement dish on the Falcon in place of the one she lost at Endor at the end of Return of the Jedi.

Roll title and release date. And that is that. That is the trailer. It may be sparse and mysterious but that is how we like it and that is how Abrams likes it. Since he likes what we like or vice versa, it can be reasonable to state this franchise and we are in good hands.

We saw none of the familiar faces that made us fall for the series in the first place but it did have some epic moments and the return of our baby–the Falcon. All of that was against the teaser and it still worked. A trailer that doesn’t spoil anything and leaves us with a mere taste, fancy that. It was well-worth the wait and praise and I can’t wait for the next glimpse like everyone else. The intrigue and suspense will remain for a long time still, probably until December 18th, 2015 but it will be a fun ride.

Star Wars will live on in long, long from now in a galaxy near you.

Thanksgiving, why must you make my life more difficult than necessary?

A little story for you first.. If you did know, you know I don’t post a lot, nor do I often say my opinion on things.  And, you are FINALLY learning my opinion, you nosy little shit you.  (Relax, I’m joking.)


Welcome to Jurassic.. wait, what?  World?

You did it.  You crazy son of a bitch.  You did it. Can I have a tissue please?

So yeah, we’re in 2014, and Spielberg finally like, gave us his promise he made us like how many years ago.  I actually remember that happening and thinking to myself, “Wow, Spielberg, you suck. He left us!  He left us!”.  However, all hope is not lost: Go get some soda and salty snacks from the vending machine and hold onto your butts, because it’s finally happening.  The director/team/people released the trailer early, which threw me off for posts.  Do-you-think-he-saurus did it because of the Star Wars trailer being released on Thanksgiving?  That’s partly why this post was so late.  I sat there for days analyzing Masrani, and then suddenly, a trailer is released.  That’s, that’s chaos theory.  Nobody could have predicted that director Colin Trevorrow would suddenly, suddenly release the trailer.

Now to get the big stuff out of the way:   Grant?  You’ll never get him out of Montana, he’s not in JW.  We will not be bringing a rock star.  So we see new characters, namely Owen, the two small versions of adults, and Bryce Dallas Howard’s character and we have to ask:  Who in God’s name do you think you are…?

Oh, did I mention we have Dr. Henry Wu here?  We’ve got Wu here.  We’ve got Wu here!  Yes, as far as I know, he was the only old character returning in the movie.  Correct me if I am wrong.  It is a breath of fresh air to see an oldie come back.

So unless you’ve been living inside fossilized amber for the last whenever, you have obviously heard about a JW trailer.  So, here’s the premise of the film:  God creates dinosaurs.  God destroys dinosaurs.  God creates man. Man destroys God. Man creates dinosaurs.  Dinosaurs destroy park.  Another man creates dinosaurs … Woman creates D. rex.  Way off on this one, Ellie.  And we do hear  some of it in the trailer.  Now, I’m not going to make a decision on whether or not I’ll like the movie, because just wait a second now, we haven’t even seen the park…  It’s the most advanced amusement park in the world, combining all the latest technologies. I’m not talking rides, you know. Everybody has rides. They made living biological attractions so astonishing they’ll capture the imagination of the entire planet!

The point is, I haven’t see the movie yet. While I want to hear every viewpoint, I really do, it’s hardly appropriate to start hurling generalizations.  The trailer wasn’t one big pile of shit.  It just had some problems: not all the problems of a major blockbuster and a major sequel, at least.  It makes you wonder why someone would do this again: But relax, it’s all part of the miracle of cloning.  I’m skeptical of the new park plot, but I think it’s making different statements than the original Jurassic Park. Genetic power is the most awesome force ever seen on this planet, and Jurassic World wields it like a kid who’s just found his dad’s gun.  Jurassic Park was about the power of genetics and not tampering with them in parts, Jurassic World is about how we can utilize it because everyone knows it’s going to happen anyway; God help us, we’re in the hands of engineers.  The kind of control you’re attempting is possible in Jurassic World – almost.  The lack of humility that’s been displayed here before nature staggers me.

The trailer opens with a woman sending off her kids to Jurassic World; when you gotta go, you gotta go.  As we all know, this could only result in good things, because kids get scared especially when dinosaurs break out.

The trailer jumps around, playing on nostalgia.

They’re flocking this way.

What is that?  Can you tell me what they are?  They’re like a flock of birds evading a predator!  Overall, I can’t wait anymore, show me something different.  We see all the machines and computers Dr. Grant hated working, and the big Apatosaurus meandering in front of the kids we see sent to Jurassic World.  Overall, Apatosaurus was a big favorite of mine who needed to be in some Jurassic Park movie and I’m pretty happy to see it there.  We see something else new, though.

A… Mosasaur? Being fed?

A mosasaur doesn’t want to be fed; he wants to hunt. You can’t just suppress sixty-five million years of gut instinct.  I wonder what actual role the mosasaur is going to have, if any, other than being eye candy.  The Pterosaurs are back, although that wasn’t in the trailer.

But then, we see what we have to be afraid of:

What have they got in there, King Kong?

We have a D. rex!

I’m fairly alarmed here.  As it turns out, the Jurassic World scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.  Now, look, there’s no reason to speculate wildly, but I’m skeptical of the D. rex.  Given the premise of the film, I don’t want to seem as though I’m not giving them due credit or make the filmmakers feel underappreciated in their time.  What you call creation, I call the rape of the natural world.  I hope to not have a repeat of the original movie without Dodgson or Nedry (we don’t have them here). I can only hope JW manages to make it’s own statements, while people are dying.

It’s apparent Chris Pratt is not out of a job, and he stars in this movie. I sincerely hope he does not become a human piece of toast in this movie, because I do genuinely like Pratt.  He told them to please, chance it, because he knows how epically famous Jurassic Park is.  Life, uh, finds a way, and hopefully Chris Pratt will.

There is something else, though.  Spared no expense.

So at first when I heard about JW, I heard about trained raptors or something.  As it turns out, things are a little different than you and I feared.  Nobody took the advice that they should all be destroyed.  Nobody remembered that they’re lethal at eight months, and I do mean lethal.

But they’re casually following Pratt on a motorcycle (that cheetah speed).  I’m afraid he’s dealt with the raptors more than anyone, but he was not a Kenyan game warden.  Even if he’s not exactly controlling them, it’s interesting these animals could be trained.  Remember, they were testing the fences for weaknesses.  Systematically.  They remembered.  Who’s to say they won’t forget what Owen is like without his gun?  After all, they show extreme intelligence, even problem solving.

Overall –  The world has just changed so radically. We’re all running to catch up. I don’t want to jump to any conclusions, but look – – I’m skeptical about Jurassic World.  I’m cautious, but remain optimistic we can see more blood sucking lawyers be eaten.

Hopefully,  the makers of Jurassic World haven’t stood on the shoulders of geniuses to accomplish something as fast as they could, and before they knew what they had, they patented it, packaged it, slapped in on a plastic lunch box, and now they want to sell it.

Seriously, though, fuck lawyers.